Equality, complaints and war with the pediatrician

Teaching children the value of human equality

When we lived in Rapid City, I babysat these two lovely kids. One day I was coloring with Ezra, who was about 2 1/2 years old. He dropped a crayon and without much thought, said, "Sheena, pick that up for me." I looked at him and said, "You can get it; I'm not your slave!" Then with even less thought, he quipped back, "No: You're my wife!"

Yesterday, the boys I watch after school were playing the board game Life. It's the game with the little cars and tiny pink and blue people that sit in the cars. I was minding my own business, when I looked up to see the game had stalled, and they were pushing a tiny pink person back and forth across the table to each other. It was then that I heard, "Haha! Let's play 'Flick the woman!'"

The 'Flick the woman' game was thought up by the same boy who, when I was pregnant, told me the baby would be born out of my mouth, because it was the only 'opening' for the baby to get out. I told him I better have a very big mouth and if he had any questions to ask his dad.

Seeing things differently

I always hated all of the 'When you have kids, you'll know/learn/do/say..." And I am happy to say I have not copied those words to anyone, but I have had some thoughts on the matter. And not only to childless individuals. It's hard to hear things like, "I'm soo tired," or "I'm soo bored." Or "I'm so busy..." It's not that I'm so tired or busy (at this moment...) but when I hear things like that, I think - Really? You're so stressed out because you had to get up this morning, get dressed AND go to work - all in ONE day?!? Yes, you better go get a massage and take a weekend getaway. When you come back, try doing all that with one - or more - children. What's that? Oh, you have a headache? Awww, let me play My Heart Bleeds For You on the worlds smallest violin of my fingers. Actually, You'll have to play it yourself because I am holding a screaming child, cooking supper, and doing a magic trick - all at the same time. But I do feel bad, really. I'm glad you can go to bed tonight and only have to worry about yourself while you sleep, uninhibited, until you have to wake up and repeat the difficult process of getting up, dressed AND going to work.

Ok, I'm done complaining, that is until I have four or five more munchkins and have a WHOLE lot more to say about things, including whiney mothers of only one child.

But then again, on the other side of the coin, just because you have children doesn't give you carte blanche for anything and everything. Your house isn't clean? Well, you do have children. You haven't bathed in two weeks? How should you be able to do anything like that with kids? Don't bother with making dinner or exercising - just grab some fast food and let yourself go, mama...

Baby class

At one of our baby classes recently, some mothers were discussing pediatricians. I don't really spend a whole lot of time dwelling on the subject. I generally take little P to the pediatrician whenever they schedule an appointment. We are in, out, and on our happy way. Not so, apparently for some mothers.

"I go to Dr. So-and-so....we've been battling over nursing baby X to sleep," one mother said, with a roll of her eyes. She proceeded to tell the other ladies about her 'battles.' I wasn't sure how you have a 'battle' with your pediatrician. Our appointments go something like this:

Dr: "Does Little P sit up by herself?"

Me: "Yes."

Dr: "Really! Wow, I guess she's normal!"

Occasionally the doctor will suggest something I'm not sold on, like giving her some special kind of water so many times a week, and I nod my head and say, "Oh...Ok!" and promptly forget about it.

At another class, I was talking to a mom about real estate. She was concerned about the cost of propane for heat, and I suggested she just look for houses with wood stoves or pellet stoves in them.

Mom: "Oh, well I don't agree with wood stoves...I'm a bit of a tree-hugger."

Me: "Oh, I see. So you probably don't want a pellet stove either then."

Mom: "Hmm, well I guess I could do a pellet stove...I don't know." (looks confused)

I guess the mom never thought about where pellets come from. Or maybe as long as the pellets don't look like a tree it is ok.